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This week is National Reconciliation Week and, to mark this, Year 1 presented a Prayer Assembly last Tuesday with the theme ‘Living Strong’. The atmosphere was very prayerful and we would like to thank all of the parents and friends who joined us to make it a special occassion.
The Scripture Focus was from the book of Revelations, Chapter 22:2
On each side of the river stood the tree of life… And the leaves of the tree are for the healing of the nations.
Confirmation
This week, Confirmation candidates have joined together with their parents in a Family Session to bring together the students' learning at home and school. This community gathering is an important part of the preparation for the students and it is an opportunity for faith sharing and discussions to take place.
Retreat Day for the students will take place tomorrow. The children in Year 5/6 may come to school dressed in their casual clothing (but appropriate to the weather). They will participate in a Reconciliation liturgy, share their stoles and meet with the Vicar General, Fr Tony, who will be confirming them on Wednesday next week.
Reminders to families to be at the church a little before time to avoid a last minute rush and so that the children can feel settled and ready for the Sacrament.
Certificate presentation and Thanksgiving Prayer Assembly will take place on Tuesday, 11 June at 2.45pm in our school hall.
I would like to say a big thank you to Mrs Katie Horsburgh for preparing the candidates at school and, together with their home preparation, the children are truly ready for Confirmation next week. There has been many extra hours and organisation dedicated to ensuring that the students are well prepared.
Nikki Dwyer
Religious Education Coordinator
OPEN CLASSROOMS next Tuesday, 10 September
Talking to your children in the classroom about their schoolwork is a wonderful sharing opportunity. It is not just about looking at what is displayed on the walls but also a time to celebrate achievements and growth and acknowledge any areas for development from the students’ viewpoint. This may involve talking about a range of different formats used in the classroom. Please come along to your child’s classroom and spend some time listening as your child guides you through their learning. Times are 8.40 – 9.10am or 3.20 – 4.00pm.
P&F MOVIE FUNDRAISER
SUNDAY, 23 JUNE MANUKA EVENT CINEMAS 3PM
Join Woody, Buzz and all the old favourites as they embark on an adventure with their new friend Forky. This is a movie the whole family will love.
Ticket price includes a bag of goodies to enjoy during the movie.
Tickets are available through Flexischools $18 each
and must be purchased by this Sunday, 16 June.
Children must be accompanied by a supervising adult.
It would be appreciated if messages regarding changes to the afternoon routine be received at the Front Office by 2.50pm please. This allows time for inclusion in the class message bag. 
The following students received an award in Week 3:
ACHIEVEMENT AWARDS
| Kinder Gold | Eddie M, Archie, Chloe |
| Kinder Blue | Eddie D, Fox, Adam |
| Year 1 | Zoe K, Xavier |
| Year 2 | Felicity, Chloe L, Anastasia, William |
| Year 3 | Hunter, Sophie K, Charlie |
| Year 3/4 | Patrick, Elsie, Hugo, Liam |
| Year 5 | Edward, Tom, Zalia |
| Year 6 | Ruby H, Mikail, Tamille |
WALK IN LOVE AND PEACE AWARDS
| Kinder Gold | Noah S |
| Kinder Blue | George B |
| Year 1 | Henry |
| Year 2 | Mateo |
| Year 3 | Mattes |
| Year 3/4 | Sophie D |
| Year 5 | Charlotte |
| Year 6 | Abigail |
LEADERSHIP AWARDS
| Principal's Award | Iggy |
School photos will be taken next Thursday, 6 June. Children are required to wear full winter uniform please.
Order envelopes may be brought on the day if they have not already been returned to school.
If you would like a family photo of siblings attending St Bede’s, please see Linda in the front office. The cost is $15.00 and is payable to St Bede’s. Please do not include in The Portrait Gallery envelope. Please note these are special orders and photos of siblings will not be taken unless requested.
(Excluding current Year 6 students)
If your child is leaving St Bede’s at the end of this year, would you please notify Julie or Breen as a matter of courtesy. This includes those who have applied for a place at Marist College, St Edmund’s College and CGS. Although we hate to see any of our families departing, our planning for 2021 will soon be under way so it's important we have this information as soon as possible.
by Maggie Dent
Research has shown that parents treat their boys and girls differently right from infancy.
For example, infant boys are touched more frequently and handled more roughly before the age of three months. Also physical punishment is applied more significantly for boys than girls in many Western countries. This is despite the fact that research also shows boys are more vulnerable and fragile.
Why do we do this?
The stereotypical belief that the only way to get boys to do the right thing is by shaming them, hurting them or being hard on them needs to be challenged every day because it is so deeply embedded into our society’s psychology. The scars this creates in early childhood fester deep inside and are often the source of future irrational rage and aggression.
This does not mean we do not discipline our boys or make them accountable for their choices and mistakes. It means we need to consciously choose the same warm discipline and communication that we tend to use around girls. We need to take much better care of our little boys — emotionally, psychologically, physically and socially. We need to stop shouting at them, hitting them, shaming them and speaking harshly to them (“Grow up!”, “Be a man”, “What’s wrong with you?”).
Communication for resilience building
We need to make it acceptable for boys and men to express feelings other than anger and this starts with how we speak to them day-to-day.
A good (generalised) example is how some people might respond if a child falls over. When a boy falls, he may be told by someone influenced by the old code: “You’re right mate, up you get.” A girl who’s fallen on the other hand may be greeted with: “Oh no sweetheart, are you OK? Come here. Let me make it better.” And offered a cuddle.
My issue with either approach is that neither child is being offered the opportunity to build resilience. The boy is being told he mustn’t feel anything and not to take pause at all — just get up and move on. The girl is being disempowered as it’s assumed she cannot pick herself up and brush herself off, but rather she needs help to bounce back from this hurdle. A more resilience-building response may be to say to either child: “Oops, you fell over. Are you ok or do you need my help?”
It’s a subtle difference in communication but the message our children get is that we expect that they are capable, their feelings are welcome (but not dictated to them) and we are here for them if they need us.
The trouble with boys
It seems when it comes to getting in trouble that our boys fare much worse than our girls. One reason for this may be because boys seem to be naturally more impulsive than girls from a young age and this can lead to them being poor decision-makers.
Michael Gurian, author of Saving Our Sons (Gurian Institute Press, 2017), writes about how males and females tend to process emotion differently in the brain. He writes that males tend to move emotions very quickly from their brains into their bodies. They also tend to sense the emotion but then shift it to areas of the brain that will work to solve the problem causing the emotion.
Females, on the other hand, tend to quickly shift emotions into the brain’s limbic system and to the ‘word centres’ of the brain. This could explain why many girls — not all, but a significant proportion — will tend to ‘talk it out’ when they have an issue but boys may be more likely to spring into action, and have a physical response, hurting someone or something in the process.
It is our responsibility to help our sons realise that they need to respect those around them when they are making these decisions.
A good starting point is for every family to implement the ‘three rules’: 1. try not to hurt yourself; 2. try not to hurt others; and 3. try not to damage things in the world around you … this sets an expectation for everyone in the household.
Finally, when boys muck up…
- Try to see the world through his eyes and practise responding, not just reacting.
- Allow him time to cool down and process the situation.
- Gently ask what was his intention?
- Help with work out which of the three rules he broke and what other choices he might have made.
- Forgive him for making a poor choice.
- Reassure him you still love him — ‘showing’ rather than ‘saying’.
Above all, our boys need us (especially we mums) to be firm, fair and fun, and to reassure them we love them unconditionally — no matter what poor choice they may have made.